


It's Gonna Be A Lonely Christmas

by Living_On_My_Own



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: Alone on Christmas, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Loneliness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:00:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24687277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Living_On_My_Own/pseuds/Living_On_My_Own
Summary: The radio was opened, Christmas songs filled the room and all of their bodies with happiness and peacefulness. The laughs exploded through the room one minute to another, adding to the perfect Christmas spirit. It was the favorite holiday of every single men in the room. They loved to be able to spend some time closely to their loved ones, no matter if it was with their close friends or their family, which they went to see rarely during the year because of their charged agenda.
Relationships: Brian May/Freddie Mercury
Kudos: 17





	It's Gonna Be A Lonely Christmas

3rd person's POV:

They were all sat in the living room, chatting about anything that came to their mind. They could talk for hours without lacking any subjects to talk about. They considered themselves as family. They all were brothers, and they had never been so close with anyone before.

Their champagne glasses were halfway filled, the liquid already had been sipped away the few minutes before. They had popped it open for Christmas, because they knew they probably wouldn't all be together the real day. Usually, one or two of them went away to their families for the occasion. So they made sure they wouldn't lose the opportunity to at least party a bit together.

The radio was opened, Christmas songs filled the room and all of their bodies with happiness and peacefulness. The laughs exploded through the room one minute to another, adding to the perfect Christmas spirit. It was the favorite holiday of every single men in the room. They loved to be able to spend some time closely to their loved ones, no matter if it was with their close friends or their family, which they went to see rarely during the year because of their charged agenda.

This year, they had separately decided to all go visit their families. Everyone, but one of them. The past months had been the worst they had since a long time and they barely saw their parents and siblings anymore. And that was why they decided to not spend Christmas with their friends this time.

Unfortunately, Freddie didn't get the chance to. His relation with his family was in a way complicated and in another, easy. They didn't like who he had become and who he truly was. So he preferred to just stop talking to them, because he thought it was better for everyone. He didn't need more criticising people in his life.

"So, who's staying at the flat this year?" Roger suddenly asked.

Freddie's hand flew slightly up with a shy smile on his face. But his smile faded away when he looked at his three friends and realised that none of them had lifted their hand. A small lump formed in his belly, growing more and more painful. He covered the sadness by a small laugh.

"Looks like I'll be the only one!" He exclaimed jokingly, but they all saw through it.

"Mary didn't invite you at her parent's house this year?" John asked with slight worry hearable in his voice.

Even after their breakup, Mary and Freddie talked a lot. She invited him a few time for Christmas at her parent's because she knew it could sometimes feel lonely at home. Freddie was incredibly grateful for her to do that for him each time.

"No, she didn't call of all the three last months actually. But it's fine, she has her life. I can't keep bringing her down with me." A flash of hurt passed in his eyes, but Freddie quickly covered it by taking a sip of champagne.

"Will- Will you be okay on your own?" Brian asked only a bit quietly as he was almost ashamed of the situation, of leaving alone on Christmas his best friend. The one that absolutely hated being alone even for only an hour.

"I'll be fine, dears! Just go have fun with your families and don't forget to think of me when you'll drink champagne." Freddie said with a playful smirk.

The three other boys still couldn't help but feel guilty. They all knew Freddie enough to figure out that he wasn't that joyful about it. Who could be joyous about being alone on Christmas anyway? And it was worse for Freddie, who liked to be surrounded by his friends at any hour of the day and under every circumstances.

"I guess you all will be leaving today? To spend the Christmas Eve with your families?" The singer asked.

They nodded one after another. They continued chatting about anything again, the subject drifting off from Roger's want to eat ice cream to the last movie they had seen. The fire in the fireplace began slowly dying, the heat not reaching the friends as much as earlier.

Within four hours, they had said their goodbyes. All of them hugged Freddie as long as possible, telling him to take care of himself, which he responded with a laugh that he'd do his best to no burn the apartment down. And he watched them get into their car and drive away. He didn't realise he was felt so sad about being alone until he really was.

It was past eleven pm when he got up from the couch and decided that it was time to go to bed. He didn't let himself think about the next day as he laid on his bed with his cat pajamas on in his and Brian's room. He quickly drifted off to sleep with the pleasant help of the alcohol he had drank with the others a few hours before. He was exhausted.

The next day, when he woke up, the sun shone through the window powerfully. He cursed Brian for no closing the curtains before going to sleep, he knew he didn't like having them open when he woke up! But then he realised that there was truly no one to close the curtains for him. The flat was empty.

Freddie quickly got out of bed and put on some clothes, knowing it would only make him feel down to stay in bed too long. He made his way to the kitchen and served himself a bowl of cereals, it was way too boring for a Christmas Eve morning.

The day actually passed pretty quickly. And unfortunately, it seemed like a normal day and not an holiday day. The singer painted most of the time or played on his beloved piano, creating rubbish melodies and lyrics that would probably never end up in a song.

When the night arrived and the sun started to go hide, it began to hit him harder and make him feel more lonely. And it was the straw that broke the camel when he opened the radio and the first song that played was (It's Gonna Be) A Lonely Christmas by The Orioles. He didn't stop himself to sob brokenly in his hands for a few minutes with the song in the background.

He didn't stop himself either when he opened the last bottle of champagne of the cabinet and started drinking it directly from the bottle. It was too quickly finished and laying on the cold floor.

Soon enough, it was midnight. Freddie's state of drunkenness didn't stop his chest from aching, it probably made it increase instead. And with a way too hysterical laugh he wished himself a Merry Christmas out loud. He continued laughing, it was probably more a sad laugh than anything.

That night, no matter how much alcohol he drank and how tired he was, the sleep didn't come to him. He tossed and turned in his bed for half an hour, then an hour, then two. His headache increased slightly at each minute. And he let himself cry more again, he let tears fall even if he simply hated it. But he hated more the fact that was alone at the night of the year he loved the most. And with this as the last thought in his head, he fell asleep.

The next morning, this time, he didn't get up from the bed directly. Freddie stayed there, laying on the bed, looking at the opened curtains that let the sun shine brightly, thinking about the fact that it was useless to get up if there was no one to get up for. And that was enough for him to stay in bed until 10:30 am.

He closed every curtain of the living room and lit a fire in the fireplace. He closed every light that was opened and sat on the couch, facing the fire. He brought a box Quality Streets, his favorite chocolates, and ate them all. He didn't care about the fact that there was an enormous number of chocolates in the box and that eating them all would definitely make his stomach hurt. These were all details. He just didn't want to think about the probably disgusting or boring dinner he'd have to eat later, alone.

He pulled a blanket over his body, trying to warm up even more, thinking it'd make him feel better in the empty apartment. The silence was heavy and uncomfortable, but he didn't want to open the radio to hear an other sad Christmas song. It would be enough to make him feel worse than anything. And it was Christmas, the day of the year he waited for 364 days impatiently.

He hadn't spent so much money buying presents to his best friends. But he had spent hours trying to find the best gift for each of them. And he finally came up with the perfect idea in his bed at 3 am during an annoying insomnia.

He didn't notice when the door was unlocked and opened. And he didn't hear when someone walked in the flat, even with their shoes on. He just kept eating the chocolates miserably, finally laying down on the couch because the headache was too painful to stay sitting.

"Freddie?"

The sound of Brian's voice surprised him way too much as he jumped from his seat and fell on the floor with a loud thump. He stared at his friend with wide eyes and quick breaths. His hand was over his chest in shock and it took him many seconds before he was finally able to talk.

"W-what are you doing here?" He asked with confusion hearable in his voice.

"Not happy to see me?" Brian joked.

The guitarist was wearing the warmest clothes in the whole world. His coat was obviously too big for him and not fashionable enough for his friend. He had a long grey scarf that he had wrapped two times around his neck. The gloves he had put on his hands were in leather, gifted by his mother, because they definitely didn't have enough money for that kind of thing. His nose and cheeks were slightly red from the horrific weather. Honestly, Freddie pretty liked that temperature, much to the disagreement of his band mates.

"No, no! I'm happy to see you! But I didn't know you'd be back so soon! If I knew I would have dressed nicer..." the singer said while looking at his ugly pyjamas bottoms and his naked chest.

"It wasn't actually planned like that." He confessed. "I just didn't want you to be alone the day of Christmas." He finished.

"Oh Bri, you should have stayed at your parent's house! I would have been fine..." The older replied.

"With all the curtains closed, an empty box of chocolate and absolutely no tv on or radio on?" The lanky man joked.

The pianist put on a frown.

"I didn't want the song It's Gonna Be A Lonely Christmas to play again on the radio. It just made everything worse! And the movies are far too happy on the tv for me to watch them alone." He said dramatically.

The younger slightly snorted with a side smile at his friend. He was such a drama queen. He would never say it out loud, but he loved it. How his friend would move his arms around way too much, roll his 'r' from time to time, roll his eyes and scoff far too occasionally. It just made him Freddie and he loved Freddie. He was like a safe place, someone to go to and be sure that he'd be willing to talk. But Brian made sure he was there too for Freddie. He'd never want him to feel all the pressure to comfort everyone and have no one to comfort him.

So he was there when Freddie had some of his panic attacks, he was there when it was harder, when his parents rejected him him after coming out, when he broke up with Mary and he was devastated, when he was hurt again by new boyfriends, when everything got too stressful. And Brian felt proud to be the one Freddie would talk to, because his friend was insanely stubborn, never wanting to talk about his feeling, telling the others it didn't matter, that he didn't want to bother them.

The poodle haired boy removed his winter outfit. He sit beside his friend and complained playfully when he checked and realised the box of chocolates was actually empty. He cooked the dinner, knowing Freddie would never be able to make something decent, and he wanted them to eat well for Christmas. Freddie thanked him for it.

They watched an endless number of cliche Christmas movies, all cuddled up on the couch. Neither of they worried about having to spend their time alone of to think about their doriens being alone. They ate loads of popcorn, enough for them to become sick. But it didn't bother them. They sat together at the end of the couch when midnight was announced. They decided it was the best time to get each other gifts.

"I know mine is not really pricey or anything, and its not much, but I thought you'd be happy." The singer said after running up the stairs quickly and coming back with a wrapped present. (Which made smile Brian at the cuteness of his best friend.)

The younger tore the wrapping paper, after trying to do it delicately, but stopped because of the complains of the singer. The gift was a painting of himself sitting on the couch, playing guitar for fun. There was Freddie's signature at the bottom of the covered canvas. Brian stared at it in awe for a while before thanking the other man and pulling him in a warm hug. The Persian giggled at the forwardness of his friend.

"So it's my turn I guess?" The guitarist exclaimed smiling.

The older nodded happily. He was given in his hand a tiny box. The guitarist didn't bother wrapping it up because he knew it would end up a mess. Freddie opened it and it revealed a gorgeous pin with two hugging cats. One white and one black. One being the day and the other the night. The contours were gold and shined because of the light of the Christmas tree.

"Oh Brian, it's so pretty!" The man happily said.

They hugged each other again. And they kissed, the best day of their life, the best day of the year. They didn't let go of each other. They told each other how much they were in love. They're ended their night joining their two bed together and sleeping as close as possible.

A few days later, Roger and John surprised them while another of their kisses.


End file.
